Trying to Fill the Void In Your Life Left by the End of American Idol
It is over, right? Not that I know who won or anything, but I seem to recall hearing many "news" pieces about how the season finale was imminent. Like last week sometime?
Anyway, dear Internet, this is your chance to vote, right here on this blog, for the dress that shall be worn to my class reunion. First, this is because I cannot possibly decide on my own and I value your esteemed opinion. Second, I'm spreading Democracy! GWB would be so proud! Third, because a little public humiliation is good for you, and as I won't be singing/dancing/modeling on national television any time soon, this is as public as it gets. But mostly, because there's no way I'm giving up enough space in my suitcase for three entire outfits, so this decision will be made before I leave California.
What you need to know: I'm pegging the reunion as Wedding Reception Without the Wedding. It's being held in a banquet hall. There will be a cash bar (cheap bastards, do they not understand how much liquor I'm going to require?) and sit-down dinner, followed by a DJ and dancing. So, yeah, wedding reception. Five dollars says we do the Chicken Dance.
Your job is to select your favorite dress. Please keep in mind the occasion, the aura that I need to project, and the fact that I will actually iron the dress after pulling it out of my suitcase, contrary to what you may see below. (Also, please ignore the horrible lighting, the end-of-day makeup and the fact that my personal trainer hasn't focused on my triceps in a while. Damn it, I'm going to have to fire my entire staff!)
Option 1: Devil in a Blue Dress
Pros:
- This a great color on me. It matches my eyes. Or it makes my eyes match the dress. Either way, good stuff.
- The style is classic and very "me."
- I have all the appropriate accessories.
Cons:
- It's from Ann Taylor, which means it's ubiquitous. Someone else will be wearing this dress or owns this dress or the woman in her office that she hates owns this dress and just wore it last week.
- It's "me," but on the conservative side of me. It's a little boring. It will shock no one.
Option 2: The Naked Dress (also, Option 2B: The Naked Dress, Sans Accessories)
Pros:
- The dress came from a boutique in LA. By which I mean a vintage clothing store in Hermosa Beach, and no, it's not vintage. At any rate, no one else will own this dress.
- The style is very "me"...the fashion-forward, edgy me.
- It will probably surprise some people, because it is very not-the-high-school-me.
Cons:
- It's, well, cream, and just waiting for someone to spill red wine on it. Probably that someone will be me.
- This reception will likely be overly air conditioned to approximately 52 degrees. I foresee nipple issues. Though perhaps that's a pro, not a con. (Hey, just being honest here.)
- Kind of a lot of jewelry. It makes for a more complete outfit, but I'm not sure how I feel about it.
Option 3: Pink Is the New Black
Pros:
- This is a $320 dress from BCBG. (No, I didn't pay nearly that much for it, but at one time, it was a $320 dress.) Highly unlikely that anyone else owns it.
- I love this dress but rarely have occasion to wear it.
- It is a surprisingly good color on me, and will compliment the fake tan well.
Cons:
- Will have to put some thought into jewelry, as nothing I own seems quite right.
- It might be a little much for this outing. And by "little much" I mean, "please keep in mind that people in Janesville routinely wear jeans and Packer sweatshirts to church on Sunday mornings."
- Again with the cleavage. The girls are held in by some sequins and that thingy that ties in the back.
So, which would you recommend, and why? As I am descended from Chicago Democrats, I have to say it: Vote early, vote often. Polls close at 5:00 PM PDT on Monday.
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13 Comments:
I gotta say, I love the blue, I don't like the cream, and the pink is flashy but perhaps a bit too much for Janesville. (Been there once, with a friend to pick up his parents who'd been stranded by car failure. Oh, and on the Badger Bus on the way to Chicago. Or was that Beloit? Anyway...)
As much as I love pink, I vote for the blue as well. And when do you leave anyway? I thought it was this weekend?
Go Blue.
Yes, the blue does look great, but as you said, it is a little conservative. Not much flare. And the pink is a little too much flare, so I'm going with Option 2 with the accessories. The red with draw extra attention, not that you want any attention ;) Have fun!!!
In spite of the spill potential, I think the cream is the best choice, too. The blue isn't quite enough, the pink a little too much for this event.
Definitely keep the accessories, too. Maybe even add red shoes to match?
I agree that Janesville may not be the place to wear the pink dress. And I'm wondering--did most of your classmates move away from Janesville? Because if they're still there, the chance of one of them owning the Ann Taylor dress is slim.
Have your Carrie moment and go with the naked dress! The pink will clash with flanel shirts and the blue will already be on the knocked up by the quarterback-highshool was the best time of my life-divorced-married again-with 2 kids-white picket fence-PT Cruiser driving-classmate.
anon -- It's next weekend.
fluttergirl -- I was trying to convince myself NOT to buy red shoes! Crap.
Lisa -- A bunch are in Milwaukee/Chicago/Minneapolis, so they've probably encountered an Ann Taylor. But for the ones still in Janesville...not so much.
fashion queen -- HA! While it's likely there will be flannel there, I don't think anyone is trendy enough to drive a PT Cruiser. And the white picket fence image...makes my skin crawl.
I like the pink, but I get the concern about it being too much. Then again, what do you care? Maybe everyone else's outfit is just not enough! I'd go with the cream for your plan B. You are Reddy Ruby after all! (Or was that Ready Ruby?)
Well, since I am your "date" for the evening and I will be driving your possibly intoxicated being home, I vote for the cream. Plus I am wearing a blue colored tank that looks to be a similar color, unless you would like to go matching. Ha ha. Don't worry, I will help you clean the red wine spill like a good friend would. Since we haven't seen many in lots of years, a little shock would be good. Although the pink dress is HOT!
I only vote on shoes.
The cream is definitely out -- looks like you're trying too hard. The blue doesn't really have the shock factor that you seem to be going for, but the pink seems like a little much. So that's where I've been wavering, and why I've waited so long to vote. If you go blue, you definitely need accessories that will give it the flair of the pink (without going as far as option B). However, there's something about the pink that, if you feel up to it, could really be fun. After all, you're NOT Janesville. You're YOU! And though I was leaning toward spiced up blue, you don't want to match your "date."!!! Have fun!
I like the blue. I think I have seen you in the blue and you looked very nice. I also like the cream but w/o the accessories--I don't like the necklace, it may be a bit too large) Don't you already have red shoes? I am sure you will look great in whichever you choose! Have fun.
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