This Installment of Incoherent Babbling Brought to You Today by the Numbers Three, Sixteen Bajillion, and the Letter F

Three -- as in, the number of hours I slept last night. The forecast for the rest of the week: more of the same.

I will not freak out. I will not freak out. I will not freak out.

Sixteen Bajillion -- the number of tasks I have left to accomplish before leaving on two back-to-back trips that have me away from here for ten days straight.

I will not freak out. I will not freak out. I will not freak out.

F -- I trust you can figure out what that one’s for.

I will not freak out. I will not freak out. I will not freak out.

Zero -- the number of brain cells functioning today, as evidenced by the following anecdotes.

Leaving my office for a meeting, I grabbed a bottle of water and temporarily set it on my desk. I left the office, got to the building’s front door and realized I’d forgotten my badge. Returned to desk for badge; departed again. Halfway across the parking lot I realized I didn’t have my water, despite having had two opportunities to grab it. Oh well, I’m not going back a second time. I got to the driveway and realized that all of the materials I’d read in preparation for this meeting were not, in fact, in the file folder in my bag, but instead were sitting on my dining room table. Great. Is there anything else I am missing??? Oh yes, how about A PEN. Hello? You’re going to a meeting and you don’t even take a pen? I managed to find one hiding at the bottom of my bag, but that was sheer dumb luck.

I’m happy to report that the meeting itself went far better than the five minutes immediately preceding it, but it did not inspire much confidence for the rest of my day.

I will not freak out. I will not freak out. I will not freak out.

Sadly, I was right. Even better was this afternoon when I ran an errand downtown. I pulled into a parking spot and took note of the fact that there was a parking meter there that I needed to feed. Errand over, I returned to the car and spotted something on my windshield. A ticket? The hell, people, this is a totally legal spot! And I certainly haven’t exceeded the one hour time limit!

I swear, I was not trying to cheat the City of Sacramento out of its 50¢ -- I forgot to put a couple of quarters in the meter. The parking meter that I noticed as I parked the car. With the quarters I keep stashed in the glove compartment for this very purpose. Forgot. In the twenty seconds it took me to roll up the windows and grab the items I needed to copy. Yeah.

I will not freak out. I will not freak out. I will not freak out.